Making Choices

Choice 1: Award is more Important

After the first term of Primary 1, I tempted Tze with improving deals from $20, to $100, to $500 in exchange for his Star Pupil badge. His final conclusion was "even with $500, I can buy lots of food, eat them and all will still come out [in the toilet]!"

Then we reflected on what type of pride he was having then; (bad) Proud that no one is as good as him or (good) Proud that his great effort and attitude are being acknowledged.

A growth mindset stretches one's attitude and potential but a fixed mindset will get him stuck with a one-time performance.

From this conversation, I thought that the award is very important to him.

Choice 2: Award is less Important

From the previous experience that award is very important to Tze Yu, I then had the following experience with him. I soon realised that my thought is not his thought!

The naughty father created a crisis for him intentionally.

Dad: You can choose to throw away either the new toy that you saved and eyeballed for 3 months or the P1 holistic award trophy.

Son: Must I choose? And why throw away one?

Dad: After we throw it away, then I will tell you an important learning.

After a long 4-5 minutes...

Son: Then throw away the trophy.

Dad took the trophy and went to the kitchen to 'throw'. Then came back to the room empty-handed.

Dad: If I were you, I would throw the toy because I can still save and buy it again.

Son: But I disagree with you. I won't know whether you would allow me to buy the toy again. But for the trophy, I can bring back another one in P2.

Father was shocked that his conventional wisdom is challenged by an interesting insight.

Dad: Son, you should choose what you believe in.

What would your child choose?